Mostrando las entradas con la etiqueta Sentido común. Mostrar todas las entradas
Mostrando las entradas con la etiqueta Sentido común. Mostrar todas las entradas

06 julio 2021

Padre y Memoria.

    Si hubiera vivido, mi padre se habría echado encima de mí con todo su peso y me habría aplastado.

    Afortunadamente, murió joven.

    En medio de los Eneas que llevan a cuestas a sus Anquises, pasé de una a otra orilla, solo y detestando a esos genitores invisibles, instalados encima de sus hijos para toda la vida; dejé atrás de mí a un muerto joven que no tuvo el tiempo de ser mi padre y que hoy podría ser mi hijo.

    ¿Fue un mal o un bien? No sé; pero acepto con gusto el veredicto de un eminente psicoanalista: no tengo superyo.

[Jean Paul Sartre, "Las Palabras"]


La Retórica de la Cita.

    No hacemos sino escribir lo que ya ha sido escrito.

    El acto de leer es una conversación diferida dice Gabriel Zaid. 

 

Padre y Memoria.

    La memoria involuntaria es la única que nos hace disfrutar de la misma sensación en una circunstancia totalmente distinta.

    La memoria voluntaria (una memoria de la inteligencia y de los ojos) no nos da el pasado sino rostros desprovistos de verdad.

    ...podría pensarse en la música como una metáfora de la habilidad que la memoria tiene de reagrupar, desde el flujo del tiempo, cualquier cantidad de imágenes y hechos que, por triviales que sean, secretan una coloración emocional que los relaciona entre sí.

    "La memoria es algo vivo, algo que está en tránsito. Y mientras dura un instante, todo lo que se recuerda se junta y vive: lo viejo y lo nuevo, el pasado y el presente, los vivos y los muertos."

[Eudora Welty]

    De donde se desprende el drama es del conjunto y del efecto que la totalidad de la historia propicia en quien lo lee.

 

La Invención del Padre.

    "La liga existencial más fuerte es la que se establece entre un hijo y su padre."

[Michel Contat] 

 

El Padre del Escritor.

    ... por todo lo que se ha dicho ya en el siglo XX a partir de la obra de Freud: la certeza de que el hijo siempre mira al padre, la opinión de algunos teóricos de que "la ética está en el padre", de que el proceso de identificación masculina se inicia en las etapas más tempranas de la infancia, de que resulta determinante para la mujer el tipo de relación que haya tenido con su padre al buscar y encontrar pareja.


El Cerebro de mi Padre.

    Ya que la identidad personal se basa en la memoria, temí por mi razón. 

[Jorge Luis Borges, "La Memoria de Shakespeare"]

    La memoria es la persona. Prive usted a alguien de sus recuerdos y dejará de existir como tal. Al desvanecerse la memoria, paulatina o súbitamente, el yo deja de estar en la conciencia y a partir de entonces sólo existe el cuerpo.

    La memoria es la identidad personal. Somos memoria.

    Primero se muere la persona, luego el cuerpo.

    El recuerdo es una "constelación temporal".

    Soy en la medida en que me cuento.

    Cuento, luego existo.

    En gran medida, dice [Jonathan] Franzen, vivir consiste en construir narrativas que van dando sentido a lo que sucede. "El proceso de ver a mi padre desaparecer es lo que me permitió cobrar pelan conciencia de que todos somos las historias que somos capaces de contar y de encarnar.".

 

Entre la Ciencia y la Literatura.

    La conciencia está en el carácter distorsionador de la memoria. Recordamos lo esencial del asunto, no los detalles. Y cada vez que recordamos lo hacemos con intensidades y colores distintos porque la memoria está muy motivada por nuestro presente y nuestro estado emocional. No importa la verdad o la falsedad o la adulteración de la materia recordada: la memoria nunca actúa de mala fe.

    Entre memoria e invención literaria hay entonces una íntima relación.

    Al cerebro hay que tratar de entenderlo en términos biológicos y no mediante analogías con la electrónica o la cibernética.

    Así, la memoria no reproduce sino que inventa, recategoriza y reclasifica. La memoria no es la repetición exacta de una imagen en el cerebro, sino una recategorización en el insondable cosmos de la bioquímica y el metabolismo cerebrales.

    Somos prisioneros del cerebro.


Neurología y Literatura.

    Recuerdo una cosa y al día siguiente la recuerdo de otro modo y es otra cosa. Cada recuerdo es una experiencia pasada que no tiene vigencia; no tiene inmovilidad. No es una estatua. Es una película.

[Francisco Ayala]

    La memoria inventa. No reproduce.

 

El Error de Descartes.

    Pero el corazón tiene su propia memoria.

[Albert Camus, La Caída]

    ... la razón no puede desligarse de su contexto emocional, todo lo contrario.

    El error de Descartes fue meternos en un racionalismo "intocable" que ponía los sentimientos por un lado y la razón por otro. [Antonio] Damasio sostiene que no es así y que los sentimientos, lejos de perturbar, tienen una influencia positiva en las labores de la razón: "En términos anatómicos y funcionales, es posible que exista un hilo conductor que conecte razón con sentimientos y cuerpo".

    Primero estuvo el cuerpo, dice Damasio, y luego el pensamiento. "Somos, y después pensamos, y pensamos sólo en la medida en que somos, porque las estructuras y las operaciones del ser causan el pensamiento".

    "Éste es el error de Descartes: la separación abismal entre cuerpo y mente, la sugerencia de que razonamiento, juicio moral y sufrimiento derivado del dolor físico o de alteración emocional pueden existir separados del cuerpo".

[Antonio Damasio]

 

Anatomía de la Memoria.

    Nuestro pasado no es lo que puede registrarse en una biografía; nuestro pasado es nuestra memoria. Puede ser una memoria latente o errónea, pero no importa: ahí está. Puede mentir; pero esa mentira, entonces, ya es parte de la memoria.

[Jorge Luis Borges]

     Debemos a la memoria una doble perspectiva, escribe [James] McConkey: no sólo el pasado informa el presente, también el presente colorea el pasado. Nuestro sentido del tiempo va cambiando con los años. En la infancia era más lento, más dilatado. Al llegar a la mediana edad, el tiempo se acelera y, en una suerte de presbicia de la memoria, recordamos mejor las cosas más lejanas en el tiempo que las vividas la semana pasada. A esta edad sentimos más la dimensión trágica de la vida y también su riqueza. A diferencia de otros animales, los seres humanos nos volvemos trágicos "porque podemos imaginar nuestra propia extinción". Pero nada como la memoria nos ayuda a mantenernos a  flote y a prepararnos para el final.

 

Proust Neurocientífico.

    A la verdad, tarde o temprano se llega por diversos caminos.

    De todos los sentidos el olfato y el gusto fueron los que más intrigaron a Proust, acaso porque son los más relacionados con los sentimientos.   

    Si no quieres adulterar nada del pasado no lo cuentes... Si no quieres matizarlo, no lo pienses. Porque más que reproducir, la memoria inventa, reorganiza en  categorías el asunto recordado.

    Así, el único paraíso es el paraíso perdido: el pasado.

    "Simplemente no hay manera de describir el pasado sin mentir"

[Jonah Lehrer]

    Y allí está el secreto de Proust: en que para recordar algo tenemos que recordarlo mal. Luego está la función del olvido, indispensable para pensar. Para editar el pensamiento. Olvidar es tan importante como recordar.


La Cuerda de la Memoria.

    Pero entonces la memoria descendería del suelo como una cuerda para salvarme del abismo de no ser.

[Marcel Proust]

    El inglés procede por imágenes... es mucho más plástico que el español y otros idiomas propensos a lo abstracto y a lo conceptual.

    ... la memoria nos constituye, ... la memoria es la persona, ... la memoria es ni más ni menos nuestra identidad personal. Soy en la medida en que me recuerdo y reconstruyo o cuento mi historia personal.


De Memoria.

    Parece como si existiera una memoria involuntaria de los miembros, pálida y estéril imitación de la otra, y que vive por más tiempo, como ciertos animales ininteligentes que viven más tiempo que el hombre. Las piernas, los brazos, están llenos de recuerdos entumecidos.

[Marcel Proust, "El Tiempo Recobrado"] 

    Al perderse la memoria también se va desvaneciendo lo que muchos actores reconocen como la "memoria emotiva". La experiencia emocional y la memoria a secas van juntas. Por eso el enfermo de la memoria o del olvido empieza a dejar de ser él mismo: se va desdibujando su identidad personal. Primero se muere la persona y luego el cuerpo. Sobrevive con un cerebro sin memoria.

    Dice [Eric Kendel] que a partir de los 25 años se manifiestan los primeros síntomas de pérdida de memoria. Hacia los 50 años, le cerebro empieza a encogerse. Cada año su volumen disminuye en un 1 por ciento.

    El conocimiento carnal se da en la esfera de las emociones, no en la de la razón. Más en el corazón que en la cabeza.

    La memoria transforma la realidad empírica en un microcosmos refractario, nebuloso o, por qué no decirlo, fabuloso. Guimaraes Rosa decía que lo bello es oblicuo y que detrás de la oscuridad de las ideas está la ingenuidad de los hechos.


El Tiempo Acelerado.

    Cuando empezamos a envejecer sentimos que los años pasan más de prisa. No era así en el remoto pasado de nuestra infancia irresponsable.

    Apenas empezamos a recordar hacia los tres o cuatro años; antes lo que hay es una especie de amnesia infantil.

    La vivencia del tiempo es una cuestión de óptica interna. La memoria ordena nuestras experiencias en el tiempo como un pintor ordena el espacio en perspectiva. Los recuerdos aportan profundidad a nuestra conciencia.

    La memoria está llena de equívocos porque el cerebro tiende a recordar lo esencial de las cosas, no los detalles.

    El tiempo realmente vivido y experimentado discurre lento cuando nos aburrimos o estamos en pena o enfermos, pero se escurre y se desvanece de manera más rápida cuando la estamos pasando bomba. Tiempo lento en el sufrimiento, tiempo rápido en la alegría.

    Mientras vamos dejando de ser jóvenes el tiempo se condensa, se acelera, nos elude. Recordamos mejor las cosas lejanas y más remotas, las de la infancia más temprana por ejemplo, que las que sucedieron ayer, en una suerte de presbicia de la memoria.

    Pero la memoria autobiográfica tiene sus leyes y va arreglando el pasado. Nada de lo que nos sucedió antes de los tres años lo recordamos. ¿Por qué? ¿Por qué las humillaciones sí tardan en olvidarse? Se recuerdan muchísimos años y de pronto un día el perdón de la memoria las evapora.

 

Constante Contacto con la Ficción.

   Lo dijo [Jorge Luis] Borges: la religión forma parte indisoluble de la literatura fantástica.

 

Recuerdo, Luego Existo.

   Si bien es cierto que la educación no nos da la felicidad, sí nos permite, en cambio, darnos cuenta de cuándo somos felices.

[Iris Murdoch]

    La imaginación no es otra cosa que la memoria fermentada.

[Antonio Lobo Antunes]

    Hay un momento en el que el ser querido ya no está. Nadie responde. No nos reconoce. Nadie reconocible habita ese cuerpo sin memoria porque finalmente lo que se ha extraviado para siempre es su identidad personal. Su yo. Su ser para los demás y para sí mismo.


La Epidemia de Alzheimer.

   Y es que la memoria nos constituye. El ser es memoria. La persona es la memoria y la memoria es nuestra identidad personal. Yo soy lo que he sido. Yo soy lo que recuerdo. Primero se muere la persona y después el cuerpo.

    Es posible que muchos enfermos sufran cada vez menos. Porque la propia conciencia también se va. Y para sufrir o temer a la muerte también se requiere de la memoria. Hay un "algo delicioso" en ese olvido, dicen algunos. Hay un aumento de sus placeres sensoriales conforme caen en esa eternidad sin pasado.

 

El Yo Fabulador.

    Cuanto se recuerda en la vida adquiere con el tiempo, precisamente por ser recordado, un carácter narrativo, y acaba viéndose, según el caso, como una película, una novela o un relato.

[Javier Marías] 

   Uno tiende a inventar y a contar mentiras no con el fin de engañar o proceder de mala fe sino para no dejar morir su imaginación. Tiene uno necesidad de referir historias, de contar para ser, porque por alguna enigmática razón sólo el trabajo de la memoria trastocada en narración es la que nos da una idea de quiénes somos: atañe esta labor narrativa a nuestra identidad personal.

Porque es posible que nuestra representación del mundo esté estructurada como una narración.

    El filósofo John Searle afirma que el lenguaje nos constituye y cohesiona a la sociedad.

    El lenguaje no sólo facilita la civilización, sino que la crea.

    Cuando contamos algo nos decoramos a nosotros mismos; se da toda una distorsión de la memoria no por razones aleatorias, sino por ciertas necesidades de la identidad personal.

[Jesús Ramírez Bermúdez]

    La memoria es humana y por lo tanto sentimental. No puede separarse de la emoción.

 

El Poder Pasión.

    La pasión tiene dos senderos: uno conduce al paraíso, el otro, al infierno.

    El escritor es un especialista en generalidades, pero en generalidades que particulariza y profundiza.

    Se padece y se goza en la creación. En cambio, en la adicción el sujeto se pierde por ciertas cosas.

 

Musicofilia.

    La música nos puede llevar a profundas emociones... Nos puede sacar poco a poco de un depresión... la música ocupa más zonas del cerebro que el lenguaje mismo. Los seres humanos, dice [Oliver] Sacks, somos una especie musical.

    La música es uno de los tres rasgos de identidad exclusivos del Homo sapiens

[Oliver Sacks]


 El Cerebro y el Sueño.

    Desde miles de años la especie humana va al desastre. Ha vuelto al mono, guardando la inteligencia del hombre.    

[Horacio Quiroga]

    El sueño es el alimento del cerebro, sin el sueño no puede cumplirse en su ciclo natural el metabolismo del cerebro.

 

Los Personajes de la Memoria.

    No deja de parecerse a un milagro que después de ese eclipse de la razón [el sueño] recobremos más o menos la razón.

    Y es que [Jorge Luis] Borges tenía para sí que cuando dormimos se enciende en nuestro cerebro un pequeño teatro y que, inexplicablemente, somos los actores, el auditorio, el edificio, el autor y las palabras que se dicen.

    Sabe [Jorge Luis Borges] que no hay memoria sin contexto emocional. Sabe que la memoria constituye la identidad personal, que la memoria es la persona, que la memoria es la imaginación.

 

La Cultura de la Dispersión.

    En cierto modo ya lo habían dicho varios maestros hindúes, como Swami Muktananda: la mente tiende a descontrolarse y uno no puede gobernarla.

    Las personas que meditan tienen más posibilidades de aplacar la agitación de lamente... el pensamiento --salvo en la muerte-- no se puede detener.

    El uso de internet no sólo está cambiando nuestros hábitos de lectura sino también nuestro modo de pensar.

    Entre más usamos el internet, más esfuerzos tenemos que hacer para leer textos largos, libros o artículos. La mente se nos va al monte como una cabra loca.

    La forma en que se busca, se encuentra, se reproduce, se utiliza, se comparte y se distribuye la información, de alguna manera va dejando su huella en el cerebro, como los pasos que a fuerza de caminar y caminar van estableciendo un sendero.

 

El Inconsciente Narrativo.

    A los seres humanos --en lo que les queda aún del niño que llevan dentro-- basta tocarlos con el pétalo de una ilusión para que salgan a las calles y las plazas a festejarlo... :la necesidad de creer.

    Más tarde o más temprano se impone el principio de la realidad y viene la decepción.

    La historia avanza porque los jóvenes tienen mayor capacidad de ilusión. Tienen toda la vida por delante, se sienten eternos y no saben de los fracasos de quienes los antecedieron.

    La oratoria de plaza sigue siendo el principal promotor del entusiasmo político.

    Las ideas, el pensamiento, la imaginación, la claridad, la capacidad de articular o concatenar emociones e ideas, el talento para poder expresarlas, son sólo posibles en la sostenida conversación con los muertos, es decir, con los autores del pasado que desde el libro nos hablan.

    La narración es una de las formas de construcción de la identidad. Lo que llamamos el yo es una narración. El pasado es una narración y el futuro es una propuesta narrativa todavía no publicada, escribe Constantino Bértolo.

    Y ya se sabe que (aunque no se sabe por qué) el corazón humano es más proclive a entender mejor una idea o un pensamiento cuando se le obsequia en forma de cuento.

    Porque a través de la narración, añade Constantino Bértolo, se le ofrece al ser humano la experiencia de la comprensión. Y de esa manera --tanto ahora como en los tiempos de Cicerón-- el orador conecta con el inconsciente narrativo de las masas.

    La narración tiene el poder de persuadir y motivar, porque apela a nuestras emociones y a nuestra capacidad de establecer empatía.

    "Biológica, fisiológicamente no somos tan diferentes unos de otros: pero históricamente, como narraciones vivas, cada uno de nosotros es único e irrepetible."

[Oliver Sacks]

 

En Borges el Habla se Homologa a la Escritura.

    Si yo cuento un sueño ya estoy modificándolo.

    Cuando soñamos estamos en la eternidad. Al despertar le damos una forma sucesiva a todo.

    Borges pensaba que lo importante del arte es conmover, no persuadir.

    Decía [Borges] que todo escritor debe pensar que cuanto le ocurre es un instrumento.

 

La Atención Dispersa.

    La falta de información puede ser tan nociva como su exceso porque impiden el entendimiento.

    Y si la inteligencia es la capacidad de asociar, de establecer relaciones, ahora resulta que la sobrecarga informática promueve en nosotros, víctimas pasivas, la atención dispersa, cuando no nos crea problemas de memoria, y nos angustia.

    Mire usted, explicó Sherlock Holmes, el cerebro humano es como un ático vacío que debe amueblarse como uno prefiere. Un tonto mete allí todos los trastos de todo tipo que va encontrándose y, de esta manera, los conocimientos que pudieran serle útiles quedan atrapados, revueltos con otras cosas, de modo que tiene dificultad para echarles mano. En cambio, el trabajador hábil se fija mucho en lo que mete en su ático mental. No tendrá en él más que las herramientas que pueden ayudarle a realizar su trabajo.

 

La Bilis Negra.

    Areteo de Capadocia decía que "los melancólicos son inquietos, tristes, desanimados, insomnes, son presas del terror si la afección hace progresos. Se ponen flacos por su agitación y llegan a perder el sueño vivificante".

    Ya hacia 1820 [...] se empezaba a creer en una forma de demencia parcial definida como desorden emocional cuyos signos clínicos y etiológicos reflejaban pérdida, inhibición, decaimiento. Esto llevó a que a la melancolía se le rebautizara como "depresión".

    Yo creo que prácticamente todos los escritores son melancólicos, que la literatura es la melancolía misma.

 

La Memoria del Cuerpo.

    Para saber de amor, para aprenderlo, haber estado solo es necesario. Y es necesario en cuatrocientas noches --con cuatrocientos cuerpos diferentes-- haber hecho el amor. Que sus misterios, como dijo el poeta, son del alma, pero un cuerpo es el libro en que se leen.

[Jaime Gil de Bidema]

    ... la mente se difumina por todos los intersticios del organismo.

    En el encuentro copular los cuerpos se adivinan y sorprenden.

 

La Mente Narrativa.

    Vivimos siempre en el pasado. Lo que creemos que está sucediendo en este momento no es sino la intervención de la memoria. En una conversación el sonido de una voz activa el receptor auditivo de la persona que está escuchando pero allí ya transcurrió un tiempo: entonces la memoria interviene.

[Ranulfo Romo Trujillo] 

    ...la razón de ser de todas las universidades es una sola: enseñar a escribir... Porque las ideas, la adquisición y la transmisión del conocimiento se hacen por escrito y se asimilan mediante la lectura.

    En uno de ellos [ensayos sobre literatura de la sección de neurobiología], levantado al azar, se razona que todo en nosotros, los animales humanos, es narrativa. Es decir, que somos puro cuento.

    El lenguaje mismo, dice [Mark] Turner, es producto de la mente literaria.

    La capacidad narrativa, como actividad mental, es esencial en el pensamiento humano.

    Casi siempre la mente humana se ocupa de construir historias y de proyectarlas.

 

Piel de Topo.

    Pensamiento en fuga, yo lo quería escribir; en cambio escribo que se me ha escapado.

[Blaise Pascal, Pensamientos]

    ... hay pensamientos que se van y retornan pero también los hay que vienen y se van para nunca más volver.

 

La Loca de la Casa.

    Para escribir mis cuentos yo elijo que sucedan en una época un poco lejana y en un lugar un poco lejano. Eso me da libertad para fantasear e incluso falsificar. Puedo mentir sin que nadie se dé cuenta y, sobre todo, sin que yo mismo me dé cuenta.

[Jorge Luis Borges]

    ...toda autobiografía, en última instancia, es una ficción.

    ... todos somos personajes en busca de un autor que nos diga quiénes somos. ¿Quién soy yo, cómo me ven los otros, cómo soy para los demás y para mí mismo? ¿Quién soy yo como criatura que flota ignorante e inerme en el universo?

    Cuando el cerebro sin memoria se diagnostica como mal de Alzheimer el enfermo entra en una de las fases terminales más crueles y humillantes de la existencia: primero muere la persona y luego --a veces mucho tiempo después-- el cuerpo.

    ... la memoria, dice José Antonio Marina, "no es un lastre que debemos soltar para ir más ligeros, sino el combustible que nos permite volar".

    La memoria inteligente es un sistema dinámico.

    ... no podríamos vivir ni pensar sin memoria.

    Y las creencias no se discuten porque están llenas de afectos y emociones que no siempre tienen que ver con la racionalidad. Tienen que ver más con el corazón que con la razón.

    Habla [La Loca de la Casa] del enamoramiento, la locura socialmente aceptable. Gracias a la fantasía, que actúa también para la reproducción de la especie, uno le inventa a la persona amada cualidades que no necesariamente tiene para los demás, más objetivos. Aunque parezca una paradoja, enamorarse es como caer en una locura sana que con el tiempo, desventuradamente, habrá de desvanecerse.

    Nos permitimos la locura a través de la pasión, que es una manera segura de sacar la locura, dice Rosa Montero.

 

Cerebro y Corazón.

    El siglo XXI será el siglo del cerebro porque los neurobiólogos llegaremos a comprender cómo funcionan la conciencia, el pensamiento y las emociones.

[Jean-Pierre Changeux]

    ... la emoción es parte de la conciencia. Razón y emoción son las dos caras de la misma moneda. Y con las dos se piensa y se toman decisiones. 

    El neurólogo francés Jean-Pierre Changeux sabe que las emociones forman parte del estado consciente y son importantes para la evaluación de lo que está ocurriendo alrededor del sujeto.

    ...el sistema límbico está compuesto por el hipocampo, la amígdala, el tálamo y el hipotálamo. A este sistema límbico se atribuye la función de regular las emociones.

 

La Mente del Escritor.

    La inspiración es el fruto más delicado de la memoria.

[Sergio Pitol]

    ...existe la creencia de que el cerebro especializado es el que tiene mayores posibilidades de ser creativo en un solo campo

    Y es que en todo ser humano confluyen tres dotaciones: la genética, la personal y la cultural, que casi siempre se entreveran. Desde muy pequeños, la mayor parte de los creadores muestran una notable independencia de espíritu que los lleva a disentir de los profesores y a cuestionar la realidad. En forma temprana también descubren temas y áreas que son terra incógnita y reconocen que hay muchas cosas que no saben. Tienen otra virtud: les gusta estar solos. Este aliento solitario, esta capacidad de darse cuenta de sí mismos, es propia de los seres creadores.

 

 

Federico Campbell.


02 junio 2021

Thoughts

    Lo verdaderamente doloroso de la muerte de un ser querido, lo brutal y catastrófico, lo que deja a uno transido e impotente no es la muerte en sí misma --que finalmente es, todavía, un fin natural de las funciones biológicas--, sino la agonía que habitualmente le precede.
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    De manera sigilosa y progresiva, el (los) personaje(s) que interpretamos todos los días terminan poseyendo sin retorno al yo que nunca se desarrolló ni emergió.
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     Si no fue una harpía, la muerte de la madre es una de las pérdidas más trágicas --si no es que la más-- del ser humano.

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    Con una ominosa y pasmosa frecuencia cada vez mayor, percibo una especie de efecto Dunning-Krugger masivo entre los colectivos y las generaciones emergentes del siglo XXI; dicho efecto se presenta como el común denominador, el elemento cohesivo y gregario del conformismo de rebaño concomitante al que aludía Fromm, a través del cuál obtienen una distracción temporal, racionalizada como éxito, que pretende acallar el impulso preternatural de la especie hacia su individualización y realización plena (¿Übermensch?); pero que sólo subsume su sometimiento y sublima aún más su inherente anhelo de libertad e integración.

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    El aprendizaje tiene, como requisitos fundamentales, al interés seguido del esfuerzo. Sin éstos, el precio a pagar es, en el mejor de los casos, la negligencia, y en el peor, la incompetencia.

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    No está mal tener miedo, lo que está mal es permitir que el miedo te paralice y te mantenga esclavizado, sometido a la situación o persona que te lo causa.

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    La necesidad es más fuerte que el amor.

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   ¿De quien es la culpa?

   ¿Tiene la culpa una persona de actuar estúpida y negligentemente?, ¿o es que acaso la estupidez y negligencia que los son inherentes, inmanentes, concomitantes quizá incluso de manera inconsciente la eximen de la responsabilidad de sus actos que sólo obedecen su nauseabunda esencia?

   Pero entonces, ¿de quién es la culpa?, ¿acaso por nuestra propia naturaleza humana nadie es culpable? De ser así, la culpa se vuelve sólo una denominación vaga e informe que se disuelve hasta desintegrarse en la hediondez cultural, intelectual, ética, moral y emocional, de aquel que transgrede por no tener más opción ni remedio que obedecer a su naturaleza ruin, baja, deleznable y repugnante.

   Quizá en última instancia la única culpa sea la de uno mismo por no terminar de aceptar que la vida es así, que así ha sido y que así seguirá; que la idea del control es una quimera, una cruel ilusión con base en la esperanza; que la resignación, más no la sumisión, es el camino menos estrecho, escabroso y ladino para la conquista de la felicidad y la tranquilidad personal.

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    Desde una perspectiva cosmológica, el ser humano, por más importante que se considere a sí mismo, es nada, más soso que una partícula de polvo de estrellas; por otro lado, desde la perspectiva inversa de la nada, la más "insignificante" de las personas --sus elecciones en múltiples puntos de su vida, y las implicaciones de ambas-- tiene repercusiones cósmicas por el simple hecho de su existencia.

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    Con relativa frecuencia, sin importar el nivel de acondicionamiento que haya uno adquirido para enfrentar la vida, para lidiar con ella, ésta te propinará eventualmente un gancho al hígado que te hará visitar la lona más de una vez.

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    La música y el lenguaje, pero aún más la primera, es lo que distingue al hombre de los otros animales. Esta distinción se enfatiza más en la generación, ejecución e interpretación que sobre la apreciación.

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    Existen ocasiones o situaciones en las que las tácticas se deben superponer a los intereses personales o a las convicciones.

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    Las responsabilidades y la obligaciones son siameses que comparten órganos vitales.

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    Tarde o temprano todos terminamos para bien o para mal, en uno u otro sentido, en los brazos de la resignación.

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    Los hijos son el espejo más ineludible que demuestra el reflejo de tu conducta, comportamiento, actitud y también del envejecimiento propio.

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    Usualmente esperamos de los amigos cosas que nos gusta escuchar, sobre todo halagos; pero en muchas ocasiones, los mejores y verdaderos amigos se distinguen por decirnos también las cosas que no nos gustaría, pero que debemos escuchar.

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    Mujeres y hombres somos esencialmente incompatibles, pero mutuamente complementarios y biyectivamente indispensables.

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    La vida está llena de sin sentidos, pero el más grande de ellos es la vida misma.

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    Si uno no tiene cuidado, la vida se encarga de que te olvides de lo que se trata: vivir...

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    Es mil veces peor un opresor que antes fue oprimido, que haber sido siempre opresor.

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    Con pasmosa frecuencia dejamos de valorar lo que tenemos en más de un sentido. Lo mismo ocurre con las buenas instituciones que hemos construido.

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    Cualquier situación irracional o exenta de propósito justificable sin la consideración de una evaluación o valoración lo más objetiva posible de las circunstancias o elementos que llevaron a ella, es una manifestación neurótica resultado de la expresión de los mecanismos del inconsciente.

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     No fue sino hasta después de mi noveno lustro de vida, que empecé a percibir de manera consciente a mis emociones y sentimientos conforme se presentaban --sobre todo aquellos considerados como "negativos"-- los empecé a reconocer sin máscaras, sin pretensiones, sin disimular, sin fingir, sin emascularlos ni emascularme; comencé a encararlos sin confrontación, a contemplarlos, a permitirles invadirme, poseerme, con la premisa de abandonarme una vez cumplido su propósito. Inicié desde entonces una conversación profunda con ellos, una conversación larga y entrañable con la finalidad catártica de tratar de comprender la enseñanza que habitualmente los acompaña. 

Algunos a veces regresan sin anunciarse, sigilosos, evitando hacerse notar, cuando por fin los percibo me encaran y examinan, como esperando algo de mí, como si se preguntaran ¿habrá aprendido por fin su lección? Debo sostener una muy buena charla porque regresan con frecuencia, aunque lo más seguro es que quizá todavía no he aprendido todo lo que quieren enseñarme.

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03 septiembre 2020

An Eschatological Laundry List

  1. This is it!
  2. There are no hidden meanings.
  3. You can't get there from here, and besides there's no place else to go.
  4. We are all already dying, and we will be dead for a long time.
  5. Nothing lasts!
  6. There is no way of getting all you want.
  7. You can't have anything unless you let go of it.
  8. You only get to keep what you give away.
  9. There is no particular reason why you lost out on some things.
  10. The world is not necessarily just. Being good often does not pay off and there is no compensation for misfortune.
  11. You have a responsibility to do your best nonetheless.
  12. It is a random universe to which we bring meaning.
  13. You don't really control anything.
  14. You can't make anyone love you.
  15. No one is any stronger or any weaker than anyone else.
  16. Everyone is, in his own way, vulnerable.
  17. There are no great men.
  18. If you have a hero, look again; you have diminished yourself in some way.
  19. Everyone lies, cheats, pretends (yes, you too, and most certainly I myself).
  20. All evil is potential vitality in need of transformation.
  21. All of you is worth something, if you will only own it.
  22. Progress is an illusion.
  23. Evil can be displaced, but never eradicated, as all solutions breed new problems.
  24. Yet it is necessary to keep on struggling toward solution.
  25. Childhood is a nightmare.
  26. But it is so very hard to be an on-your-own, take-care-of-yourself-cause- thereis-no-one-else-to-do-it- for-you grown-up.
  27. Each of us is ultimately alone.
  28. The most important things, each man must do for himself.
  29. Love is not enough, but it sure helps.
  30. We have only ourselves, and one another. That may not be much, but that's all there is.
  31. How strange, that so often, it all seems worth it.
  32. We must live within the ambiguity of partial freedom, partial power and partial knowledge.
  33. All important decisions must be made on the basis of insufficient data.
  34. Yet we are responsible for everything we do.
  35. No excuses will be accepted.
  36. You can run, but you can't hide.
  37. It is most important to run out of scapegoats.
  38. We must learn the power of living with our helplessness.
  39. The only victory lies in surrender to oneself.
  40. All of the significant battles are waged within the self.
  41. You are free to do whatever you like. You need only face the consequences.
  42. What do you know...for sure...anyway?
  43. Learn to forgive yourself, again and again and again and again...


I You Meet the Buddha on the Road, Kill Him!
Dr. Sheldon B. Kopp

 

01 septiembre 2020

PART FOUR: If You Meet the Buddha on the Road, Kill Him!

Learning to learn.

"... He[disciple] learns, once he is willing to give up being taught, that he already knows how to live, that it is implied in his own tale. The secret is that there is no secret..."
"... Everything is just what it seems to be. This is it!..."
"... The Zen way to see the truth is through your everyday eyes. It is only the heartless questioning of life-as-it-is that ties a man in knots. A man does not need an answer in order to find peace. He needs only to surrender to his existence, to cease the needless, empty questioning. The secret of enlightenment is when you are hungry, eat; and when you are tired, sleep..."
"... The Zen Master warns: "If you meet the Buddha on the road, kill him!" This admonition points out that no meaning that comes from outside of ourselves is real..."
"... The only meaning in our lives is what we each bring them..."
"... We must each give up the master, without giving up the search..."
"... We must learn that each of our lives can itself become a spiritual pilgrimage, an exiled searching without end. Our only comfort on this lonely journey is that for each man it is the same..."
"... Each accomplishment, itself, becomes the next obstacle to be overcome..."
"... And the brujo-sorcerer himself is never fully beyond his own follies. But he has learned to act with controlled folly..."
"... In a sense, nothing really matters, in and of itself, because the importance of things lies in the ways you have learning to think about them..."
"... The Man of Knowledge has come to see that any efforts on his part to try to control the nature of things, or to change others, is useless..."
"... Seeing through the eyes of a Man of Knowledge results in our finding ourselves alone in a world filled with folly..."
"... Controlled folly allows us to look at the world sometimes, so that we may laugh..."
"... So it is that there is nothing to be taught, but yet there is something to be learned. There is something we may come to understand, but not if we demand that it be explained to us. There is something that may happen to us, but not if we await its coming from outside or ourselves..."
"... Enlightenment and the freedom it brings are always imminent but our very efforts to catch hold of what we are seeking may prevent us from discovering what is already there..."
"... On our pilgrimage, we are defeated not only by the narrowness of our perspective, and our fear of the darkness, but our excuses as well..."
"... I see that there is no prison except that which I construct to protect myself from feeling my pain, from risking my losses..."
"... Whatever I gain will not change my life, and whatever pain I may have to endure, I will be able to survive..."
"... Freedom is just another word for nothing left to lose..."
"... A man, after all, is only a man. He stands somewhere between absolute freedom on the one hand and total helplessness on the other. All of his important decisions must be made on the basis of insufficient data..."
"... It may not be fair that a man gets to have total responsibility for his own life without total control over it, but it seems to me that for good or for bad, that's just the way it is..."
"... This dilemma of living a life of total responsibility, within an existence of only partial knowledge and partial freedom, reflects the suffering of "Mankind drowning in the Great Sea of Birth, Death and Sorrow"[Christmas Humphreys]. A man who lives in a world without appeal, a world in which God has died, has no one else to forgive him. He will be "punished by his sins, not for them"[Ibid]. And so, each day he must forgive himself, again and again. He is subject to his own personal limitations, in a changing world, designed by a lunatic..."
"... New solutions breed new problems..."
"... A man can strive to grow, but this pilgrimage is merely an "unceasing journey from what we seem to be to what we are"[Christmas Humphreys]. Each day, each situation brings with it new uncertainties with which to cope. The world is essentially arbitrary in its movement, predictable only in the least important ways..."
"... The growing edge eats away at itself, and in a sense we have come no further than we were when we first started out. And yet, to be a man, in the best sense, is to be willing to keep moving, though we make no measurable gain..."
"... The most important struggles take place within the self..."
"... His[patient] truth lay, not in some distant place, but within himself..."the Sage arrives without going"[Arthur Waley]..."
"... Sometimes life seems like a poorly designed cage within which man has been sentenced to be free. Condemned to this freedom, it is difficult for a man to face the fact that he feels like a misfit in this life, difficult until he discovers the secret that "all men, finally, are misfits"[Melvin Maddock]..."

The Pilgrimage of the Young.

"... Each generation of adolescents makes its own sort of search for meaning..."
"... The way must not be sought by putting ecstasy into my body, but by finding it within my Self..."
"... trusting the young is the only hope of each aging generation..."

My Pilgrimage to the Sea.
"... Yet this part of why I return to the sea, to put myself in touch once more with my terrible loneliness, to learn again that I must bear this. To remember that this pain is the same for us all, that it is each man's weakness and his strength..."
"... surrender to things as they were..."
"... And should my body be battered even more, then I will live as I can, enjoying what I might, having what joy is available to me, and being what I may to the people whom I love..."
"... Along these way, like everyone else, I must bear my burdens. But I do not intend to bear them graciously, nor in silence. I will take my sadness and as I can I will make it sing. In this way when others hear my song, they may resonate and respond out of the depths of their own feelings..."

 

If You Meet the Buddha on the Road, Kill Him!
Dr. Sheldon B. Kopp

 

29 julio 2020

PART TWO: Telling of the Tales.

Tale of Man Against the Gods.
"... Each man has his Enkidu, his other half, his hidden self. The more he is out of touch with his double the more a man's life is an empty and unsatisfying burlesque..."
"... There is never one pole without the another, no truth without a valid opposite, no going far enough in one direction without coming full circle..."
"... No man can be fully a man unless he comes to terms with the female double within him. So too, with women and their male shadows. Those who do not know their sexual counterparts are absurd caricatures of the identities to which they aspire..."
"... Like that of all other pilgrims, Gilgamesh's quest is related to a search for the meaning of life. We all live in a tragicomic situation, a life that is in part absurd simply because it is not of our own making. We are born into a disordered world, into a family we did not choose, into circumstances we would have had somewhat improved, and we are even called by a name we did not select..."
"... Parents always turn out to be a disappointment, one way or another. Frustrations are many, and life is inherently unmanageable..."
"... Helpless as we are as children, to change the world, or to move on and take care of ourselves, we must develop ways of pretending that we are not so powerless..."
"... Life is mainly simply inevitable..."
"... "the meaning of life can be revealed but never explained". The point is that there is no point..."
"... Perhaps the most difficult thing for the patient to accept is that he is quite ordinary..."
"... I talk often of death, of his (patient) death and mine and of the deaths of people we love... We will be dead a long, long time. That will be it. There is no meaning. It's a random universe, and time is short. It slips by even as he wastes it complaining, feeling sorry for himself, trying to be special, to be compensated for his misfortunes..."
"... The central fact of my own life is my death. After a while, it will all come to nothing. Whenever I have to courage to face this, my priorities become clear. At such times nothing is done in order to achieve something else. No energy is wasted on maintaining the illusions. My image does not matter, I do not worry about how I am doing. I do what I do, am who I am. That's it. The imminence of my own death is the pivot around which things turn. This makes what is going on now all that counts..."
"... it's so terribly hard to remember that we have so little time..."
"... Not only are there many things that we never get around to dealing with, but even when we do, there is so damn much waste in the process, so much unnecessary distance between ourselves and those with whom we try to make life..."
"... Too often, I forget that I am dying, that we each of us suffer from the same terminal disease. At such times, when I do not remember to remember, I blow it. The pilgrimage of Gilgamesh reminds me of "the absurdity of life and death, heroic wistfulness, nostalgia for lost possibilities, melancholy of missed perfection ...[and that even] the love of comrades cannot prevail against the insult of death". The pilgrimage of my brother, Gilgamesh, helps me not to forget."

Tale of a Spoiled identity.
"... The roots of most women's problems are political and social..."
"... There was much to be learned, and perhaps even more to be unlearned..."
"... a young girl's sense of who she is in her mother's eyes is also a crucial parameter in the development of her stigmatized self..."
"... individuals cannot be understood apart from the social contexts in which they live and that an understanding of social structures and processes depends in part on knowledge of personality dynamics [Essay Statement of Purpose by Willo]..."

Tale of a Discontented Disciple.
"... This Sanskrit word, Siddhartha, means "he who has achieved his aim"..."
"... He [Siddhartha] wishes to experience the Atman (the universal consciousness) and comes to see that: "One must find the source within one's own Self"..."
"... The psychotherapy patient must also come to this heavy piece of understanding, that he does not need the therapist. The most important things that each man must learn, no one else can teach him..."
"... Illusions die hard, and it is painful to yield to the insight that a grown-up can be no man's disciple. This discovery does not mark the end of the search, but a new beginning..."
"... They [Kamala and Siddhartha] are happy together, as she shows him that "one cannot have pleasure without giving it"..."
"... Psychotherapy patients also soon learn to be moved by their nocturnal visions as they discover that we are often wiser when we dream than we are awake. Because the dreaming experience is unhampered by whorish Reason, and the dreamer is not distracted by the conventional wisdom of other people's perspectives and expectations, we sometimes see most clearly when our eyes are closed..."
"... nightmares are simply those dreams that we are too frightened to complete. We panic. The fear that we will confront something that will face us with more terror than we can bear leads us to escape into waking, still haunted by the awful bad-dream feelings..."
"... Sexual love is an art, and art is a game; every game is dangerous, for the player may sooner or later forget it is a game... [From the book Siddhartha]"
"... After a time, Siddhartha learns to live with things as they are...He learns that wisdom is "nothing but a preparation of the soul, a capacity, a secret art of thinking, feeling, and breathing thoughts of unity at every moment of life"..."
"... Wisdom is not communicable. The wisdom which a wise man tries to communicate always sounds foolish...[From the book Siddhartha]"
"... There is nothing to tell because the distinctions between things are illusions. "Truth cannot be taught... [because] the paradox of paradoxes [is] that of each truth the opposite is equally true"..."
"... Before Siddhartha could discover that he needed no teacher, he first had to exhaust his longing for others to guide him, to take charge of his life. So too, with the patient of psychotherapy and with every one of us. Unwilling to tolerate life's ambiguity, its unresolvability, its inevitability, we search for certainty, demanding that someone else must provide it. Stubbornly, relentlessly, we seek the wise man, the wizard, the good parent, someone else who will show us the way..."
"... But what if we are talking to ourselves? What it there is no one out there listening? What if for each of us the only wise man, the only wizard, the only good parent we will ever have is our own helpless, vulnerable self? What then?..."
"... If I cannot have the good parent, at least I can become the good parent..."
"... It is not possible to know how much is just enough, until we have experienced how much is more than enough..."
"... The psychotherapy patient is also encouraged to give in to himself, if he is ever to be free of himself. You cannot get out of a trap unless you first get into it. Overcoming by yielding is the only escape..."
"... The only times that we can have what we long for are those moments when we stop grasping fo it. At such times, all things are possible: "to a mind that is 'still', the whole universe surrenders"..."

Tale of a Quest for Love.
"... lifetime commitment to monogamous union seems to me the most rewarding alternative available in our present culture. I certainly wish to be open to the other alternatives, which are being suggested by the articulate spokesman and spokeswomen of the sexual revolution, women's liberation, and communal living, but I do confess to finding it hard to believe that new solutions will not engender new problems. At present, I see monogamous, lifelong marriage as our most viable solution to loneliness, as the best setting so far available in which to raise children, and as the most practical contract for mutual support and freedom in a world so difficult for any one person to manage within..."
"... marriage is also limiting, frustrating, and periodically terribly painful..."
"... long-term commitments to being out of work, or to remaining single, seem to create greater problems than they solve..."
"... Ironically, in these willful struggles [marital difficulties], a spouse often complains bitterly about having to live with a mate who is acting in just the ways that he (or she) found most attractive during courtship..."
"... What people look for in marriage, at least in part, is the other half of themselves..."
"... To some extent, each of us marries to make up for his own deficiencies..."
"... In order to survive as children, we have all had to exaggerate those aspects of ourselves that pleased those on whom we depended, and to disown those attitudes and behaviors that were unacceptable to them. As a result, to varying degrees, we have each grown into disproportionate configurations of what we could be as human beings. What we lack, we seek out and then struggle against in those whom we select as mates..."
"... Like it or not, these same differences between spouses are both the strengths of a good marriage and the hazards of a bad one..."
"... One way of conceiving the origins of these struggles [marital difficulties] is in terms of how children shape their identities in their relationships with their parents..."
"... The ambiguity and uncertainties of fulfilling oneself as a man or as a woman sometimes mask the more profound anguish of simply being human..."
"... sexuality has qualities that draw other problems... Sex is an arena within which other kinds of problems get played out..."
"... sexual longings are to some extent instinctual, and therefore dependable..."
"... sexuality is an expendable instinctual need..."
"... Willfulness, stubbornness, spite, and other petty insistences of maintaining the illusion of being in control of that which we cannot control, run rampant in the relationship between the sexes. The unwillingness to be vulnerable, to be helpless, to give up control, to trust, is deployed in a mad attempt either to get one's own way, or failing that, at least to make sure that the partner does not get his (her) own way. Getting our own way, that which Dame Alice says is what women want most, is, God help us, as often what men want most for themselves as well."

Tale of a Power Trip.
"... Once content to serve those in power, he [Macbeth] now begins to know the "black and deep desires" for greatness, the "vaulted ambition" for a position over other men..."
"... Power trips often figure centrally in the struggles of the psychotherapy patient/pilgrim as well. The ironic difference is that these patients have most often been trapped into seeking an illusory form of power, one which ultimately renders them powerless..."
"... It is not the power he wields, but rather the demonically soul-absorbing longings for ascendance that eat away at Macbeth's character..."
"... the illusion of interpersonal power, the fantasy of having power over other people's feelings..."
"... One way or another, power over others always turns out to be a costly burden..."
"... For a child to be able first to survive and then to grow toward being a happy, creatively self-fulfilling adult, he must be taken care of by his parents..."
"... Power illusions are always the result of an early two-party contract..."
"... Beware the helplessness gambit of the chronic victim!..."
"... Sometimes it seems to me that in this absurdly random life, there is some inherent justice in the outcome of personal relationships. In the long run, we get no more than we have been willing to risk giving. We get to keep no more than we earn by our own efforts. In a way, we each get what we deserve. Everyone is entitled to keep as much garbage as he is willing to put out or to put up with..."
"... children need at least the continuing hope that their parents may come to love them..."
"... Her destiny did not have anything to do with what sort of child she really was. Had she been born to the family next door, she might have been valued and enjoyed for the sort of lovely little girl she once was..."
"... Her only real power lies in taking charge of her own life, enjoying being who she is, and making her life as meaningful as she can for herself, whatever others may or may not expect of her..."
"... the past cannot be buried without the pain of mourning..."
"... The illusion of power over the feelings of others is a deadly chimera..."
"... I've really got it straight in my head that no one is any bigger than I am. It's the other part that I can still sometimes get hung up on... At my worst moments, I am still tempted to the arrogant presumption that I can victimize other people, lesser beings whose fragile feelings I should somehow be taking care of. Lord protect me from the so-called "victims"!"

Tale of a Mad Knight.
"... I prefer the madness of Don Quixote to the sanity of most other men..."
"... Attempts at social change are after all usually left to the youthful idealists, while older cynics wait for young fools to outgrow their folly..."
"... Life is very dull for those too timid, too unimaginative, too sane to bring to it a sense of personal style, of individual purpose, of color, verve, fun, and excitement. Don Quixote's Quest, the personal pilgrimage of his mad life, was to live in "the world as it is traversed by man as he ought to be"[Wood Krutch]. If this be the wine of madness, then I say: "Come fill my cup"..."
"... The clinical diagnosis of psychopathology is too often a form of social control..."
"... Distorted views of the world do not always constitute corruption of the purpose of one's quest..."
"... Of course, being crazy can instead be a stubborn expression of self-destructive willfulness. There appear to be many people who choose to go crazy (or become alcoholics, addicts, criminals, suicides) rather than have to bear the pain and ambiguity of a life situation that they have decided that they cannot stand..."
"... At the end of a series of colorfully zany misadventures, Don Quixote also achieved sanity. On his deathbed he had to endure the moralistic admonishment of his deadly sane housekeeper: "Stay at home, attend to your affairs, go often to confession, be charitable to the poor". Such is the lesson of sane virtue, "but a man may have to go through hell to learn it"[Cervantes]..."
"... Don Quixote died "having gained his reason and lost his reason for living"[Madariaga]..."
"... madness. Sometimes it seems like it is the only way to travel in a dully sane and destructively stable world. In other instances it seems to me to be an irresponsibly willful cop-out..."
"... dreams can be understood, but they cannot be "explained"..."

Tale of Descent into Hell.
"... Open yourself to listening to his tale[Dante], if you dare, and surely you will see what he saw..."
"... This descent into the pit of his own soul is the journey of every pilgrim. No patient in psychotherapy can recover his own beauty and innocence without first facing the ugliness and evil in himself..."
"... The ways in which we live, the experience of our own sinful souls, still is itself our only Hell..."
"... A clear example of the built-in self-torment of neurotic behavior is apparent in the ways of the manipulative patient..."
"... you can't make anyone love you. You just have to reveal who you are and take your chances..."
"... The victims of confidence men are always those secret thieves who hope to get something for nothing..."
"... You can't cheat an honest man[W.C. Fields]..."
"... I can't tell the knife from the wound..."
"... Only by facing life as it is can he[Dante] find salvation..."
"... Being neurotic is being able to act badly without feeling responsible for what you do..."
"... Mortality is an empirical issue. Worse yet, he[patient] wants to be bad but to have an excuse for his irresponsibility..."
"... His only way out[of patient] is to see that his pilgrimage to the heavenly City must be undertaken along the road through Hell. When we lay claim to the evil in ourselves, we no longer need fear its occurring outside of our control..."
"... Nothing about ourselves can be changed until it is first accepted... "the sick man has not to learn how to get rid of his neurosis but how to bear it"[Jung]..."
"... If we flee from the evil in ourselves, we do it at our hazard. All evil is potential vitality in need of transformation. To live without the creative potential or our own destructiveness is to be a cardboard angel..."
"... Dante has descended into the Abyss of Evil; he has had to spend a season in Hell, before he could rise once more to be illuminated by the Divine Light. There is no sin he could not find within himself. He is as good and as bad as the rest of us. But even if you should believe that some men are better than others then I ask you in the name of myself and all of the others who find that we have never had a completely pure motive in our entire lives: "Even if a man is not good, why should he be abandoned?"[Lao Tzu]"

Tale of a Search for Belonging.
"... This wish to satisfy someone greater than the Self, to be found acceptable, to belong at last, is a struggle familiar to many psychotherapy patients. In their lives they waste themselves on wondering how they are doing, on trying to figure out the expectations of others so that they can become someone in the eyes of the others..."
"... My own basic first principle had finally become: take care of yourself!..."
"... some things were just too hard to do alone..."
"... I told him that the rule that his family had neglected to teach him was that it is important for each of us to be in touch with his own feelings, to know his own wishes..."
"... Over the years it had become clearer to me that the more of a claim I made on the world, the more often I got what I wanted..."
"... I assured him, before learning the outcome, that whatever the results, he had done just right, he had honored his own wishes..."
"... There is a tyranny inherent in the reciprocities of every system. Rules for a group always violate individual rights. Both slave and master are trapped and dehumanized (though the bulk of my sympathy goes readily to the more explicitly oppressed of the pair). It is, of course, necessary to have rules and procedures if we wish to accomplish large and complex tasks, but the question of whether or not it is worth the cost must be perennially re-examined. Anarchy could never get a man to the moon, but it may become the only mode that can allow us to survive on the earth..."
"... All institutions fall short of their purposes. Sometimes it seems to me that they are more trouble than they are worth, that they bring with them evils at least equivalent to the social good that they provide. The family is the social institution that I trust most, and there certainly have been times when even that has seemed like a mistake to me..."
"... I wish [as a therapist] to help expand consciousness, not to diminish it...I hope to help the pilgrims who seek my guidance to see that all rules are mere conventions, games that one can play or not. It is only necessary to recognize that they are games, to do what you wish, and to face the consequences of your behavior..."
"... It is necessary first to teach some patients how to play, before they can become free to know and follow their own wishes. A revolution must be started in their heads. They are trapped more by the rules in their own minds than by social expectations and constraints..."
"... So often intent on learning the rules of the game of life, the patient/pilgrim often tries hard to get the guru/therapist to instruct him... The patient cannot believe that the therapist has only learned to play "the game of no game"..."
"... all rules are merely arbitrary conventions, sometimes useful but never necessary, sometimes timely but never of enduring relevance... He has no rule that is not willing to break..."
"... All these[Zen koans, shamanistic trances, and other games] serve as reminders of the arbitrariness of the rules that bring the temporary appearance of order to this absurdly chaotic, madly entropic life we live..."
"... Rules will come to serve as tentative guidelines. Each act will have to be judged as a personal experience, in terms of its existential meaning, rather than by checking it out against a rule carved on a stone tablet long ago and far away [situational ethics]..."

Tale of a Holy Warrior.
"... each person can only save his own soul..."
"... confronting one's own personal garbage is the way to begin..."
"... When a psychotherapy patient gives up just trying to feel better in recognition that he must instead be willing to change, that too is a new beginning..."
"... The practical considerations about how to maintain the Church and expand its power drained the spiritual fire and excitement of being an early Christian. Instead one had to learn to be a good Christian. No longer was it important to live out one's salvation. Instead, the point became to achieve it and keep it..."
"... It does not matter (for the psychotherapy experience) what the journey is about. It matters only that the patient stay on the road. The "aboutness" is the same pseudo-problem of "content" that was created in the world of Art when "people used to ask what a painting was about[McLuhan]"..."
"... McLuhan teaches us that "the medium is the message"..."
"... the personal and social consequences of any medium result more from the shape and the scale of the message than from its content..."
"... When applied to psychotherapy, the thesis that "the medium is the message" means that the meta-assumptions and the parameters of psychotherapy, in themselves, constitute the "cure", regardless of the content of what the patient discusses. The very act of focusing attention on himself (by telling his tale) already changes things. Behavior of which he is aware is already different from that same behavior unobserved by the patient. In fact, the mere act of entering the pilgrimage of the psychotherapeutic journey is itself a transformingly courageous acknowledgment of the existence of critical problems and a daring expression of the longing for resolution..."
"... He[the patient] will have to deal with his responsibility for what he does, at the same time that he discovers that he is not fully in control of all of his life..."
"... Being in treatment may show him[the patient] the way he is to journey, but it will be up to him to reclaim his salvation continually by remaining on the march for the rest of his life."

Tale of the Eternal Jew.
"... The repentant sinner is ever God's favorite child. Every man lives in a state of vague Kafkaesque guilt. Like Job, we all feel that if we suffer, there must be a reason; that if we are unhappy, it must be that we deserve it. So it is that we long for forgiveness, for redemption. After all, if we admitted that we lived in a random universe, where virtue is often not rewarded and evil not punished, there would never be any hope of our being forgiven for our sins and taken care of forever by lovingly all-powerful God..."
"... Recognition of my all-too-obvious fallibility can provide the relief of learning that some happiness is spossible without his[patient] having to reach some state of perfection..."
"... He[patient] can bear his pain for a while if only someday, someway, he will be able to reach a state of blissful perfection, a time when he will have no more conflicts, anxieties, or uncertainties... enlightenment does not provide perfection. Instead, it simply offers the pedestrian possibility of living with the acceptance of imperfection..."
"... What then is a man to do when he realizes that his exiled wandering is to be a lifelong pilgrim, a journey that ends in oblivion rather than in Paradise? Camus crystalized life's absurdity when he wrote: "There is but only one truly serious philosophical problem, and that is suicide". There is only THIS life. Live it, or give it up! It does no good to choose to live it reluctantly hedging by whinning that it's not sufficient, that someone must make it better for you..."
"... The experienced alienation of the neurotic is the self-sorry separation from the community of other lonely wanderers..."
"... When a psychotherapy patient does do the work of facing up to some of what he must endure, he is often rewarded by a sense of increased freedom and joy. However, as he comes to realize that there will be no light without some darkness, no rest without further toil, he may balk disappointedly to find that troubles never end. New solutions lead to new problems. New freedom leads to new responsibilities..."
"... our old problems would remain temptations to messing-up for the rest of our lives, that we must each remember to remember that we will never be beyond error. Nothing important gets solved once and for all, finally and forever..."
"... Perhaps all therapy can teach any of us is how to accept the inevitability of making this unending journey. If Camus is right, and if knowing that, we do not choose suicide, then how are we to live in a chaotically absurd world that is so often dominated by human suffering? Perhaps it calls for the Hasidic commitment to "joy in the world as it is, in life as it is, in every hour of life in this world, as that hour is". This means the hallowing of everyday life, taking each experience not as good or as bad, but as natural. In therapy, this is learned as accepting my feelings, not because they are constructive, or moral, or healthy, but simply because they are MINE, HERE and NOW..."

Tale of a Journey into the Darkness of the Heart.
"... As children we owned all of ourselves. As adults, in response to the expectations of others, we have had to hide much of ourselves away, out of sight even from our own eyes. The cost of such voluntary losses is great..."
"... No one can afford to give up any part of himself. All of you is worth something. Even the evil can be a source of vitality if only you can face it and transform it..."
"... For the sake of appearing to be what others require us to be, to be more moral than any man can be, we sacrifice strength..."
"... good is no more than the other face of evil, that it is all vitality. "Sin" derives from the old archery term that simply means "missing the mark"..."
"... Patients do not at first realize that they already have all that they need for a meaningful life..."
"... My task as guru is to interest the patient in his own evil, so that he may claim and transform it..."
"... the way in which they[fantasies] increase my freedom to live decently. By recognizing this evil in my self, and by satisfying it in fantasy, I decrease the possibilities that I will find some devious ways of living it out with other people..."
"... It is very important to me that I not hurt other people unless I mean to... I have tried to teach my sons the same freedom and responsibility..."
"... I have taught my sons to love, but first of all I have tried to teach them how to hate openly when need be so that they may survive..."
"... I am not what society has taught me that I ought to be..."
"... The bad luck, suffering, and even the death of an enemy always gives me a sense of well-being. It is a time to celebrate..."
"... In therapy, a patient can learn to become aware of the evil in himself, to live with it as he can, enjoy it as he may, and forgive himself for being human..."
"... He[Arthur Miller] knows that people will go on hurting each other, one way or another..."
"... Such horrors are possible not because of the evil of one man, but because of the folly of the many..."

If You Meet the Buddha on the Road, Kill Him!
Dr. Sheldon B. Kopp

22 junio 2020

PART ONE: Take from No Man His Song.

Pilgrims and Disciples.
"... We must always see our own feelings of uneasiness as being our chance for "making the growth choice rather than the fear choice"..."
"... The therapist is an observer and a catalyst. He has no power to "cure" the patient, for cure is entirely out of his hands..."
"... the patient is already fully equipped for getting well..."
"... People seek the guidance of a psychotherapist when their usual, self-limited, risk-avoiding ways of operating are not paying off, when there is distress and disruption in their lives..."
"... though the patient enters therapy insisting that he wants to change, more often than not, what he really wants is to remain the same and to get the therapist to make him feel better. His goal is to become a more effective neurotic..."
"... This listening is that which will facilitate the patient's telling of his tale, the telling that can set him free..."
"... life is just what it seems to be, a changing, ambiguous, ephemeral mixed bag..."
"... The pilgrim is at war with himself, in a struggle with his own nature. All of the truly important battles are waged within the self..."
"... But as a therapist, I know that though the patient learns, I do not teach..."
"... The metaphor of his journey is a bridge, and as the pilgrim crosses it, "a fiend clutches at him from behind; and Death awaits him at the farther end"..."
"... you can stay at home, safe in the familiar illusion of certainty. Do not set out without realizing that "the way is not without danger. Everthing good is costly, and the development of the personality is one of the most costly of all things". It will cost you your innocence, your illusions, your certainty."

 

The Healing Metaphors of the Guru.
"... In reality, what he [guru] offers them is guidance toward accepting their imperfect, finite existence in an ambiguous and ultimately unmanageable world..."
"... Even the contemporary Western guru, the psychotherapist, can only be of help to that extent to which he is a fellow-pilgrim..."
"... The Truth does not make people free. Facts do not chance attitudes..."
"... the security of known misery, rather than openness to the risk of the unknown or the untried..."
"... In the religion, myths, and literature of every culture, the personal motives and conflicts that men would disown are represented by gods and ghosts, by spirits and visions..."
"... What the guru knows that the seeker does not is that we are all pilgrims. There is no master, and there is no student. At its worst, the fundamental humanity of the guru may be expressed in his inevitable corruptibility..."
"... The arrogance of the guru may tempt him to self-elevation, or he may be done in by his followers' needs to make more of themselves through his apotheosis..."
"... The teaching mission of the guru is an attempt to free his followers from him..."
"... The guru instructs the pilgrims in the tradition of breaking with tradition, in losing themselves so that they may find themselves."

Disclosing the Self.
"The guru instructs by metaphor and parable, but the pilgrim learns through of his own tale..."
"... it is the compelling power of the storytelling that distinguishes men from beasts. The paradoxical interstice of power and vulnerability, which makes a man most human, rests on his knowing who he is right now, because he can remember who has been, and because he knows who he hopes to become..."
"... The contemporary pilgrim is a person separated from the life-infusing myths that supported tribal man..."
"... Today, each man must work at telling his own story if he is to be able to reclaim his personal identity..."
"... The basic presumption is that the telling of the tale will it-self yield good counsel. This second look at his personal history can transform a man from a creature trapped in his past to one who is freed by it. But the telling is not all..."
"... as each man tells his tale, there must be another there to listen..."
"... A man not only needs someone to hear his tale, but someone to care as well..."
"... Love is more than simply being open to experiencing the anguish of another person's suffering. It is the willingness to live with the helpless knowing that we can do nothing to save the other from his pain..."
"... that pain in each of us that can from time to time be eased, but from which there is no final escape, save death..."
"... I try to be guided by Carl Whitaker's advice to feed the patient not when he is crying that he is hungry, but only when I feel the milk overflowing from my own nipples..."
"... who can love me, if no one knows me? I must risk it, or live alone..."
"... Before a man can be free, first he must choose freedom. Then the hard works begins..."
"... Though I believe that the only real danger lies in that which is hidden, disclosure of myself must precede disclosure to the other..."
"... As a child, I was so often lonely and out of it that if I had not found the tales of others in the books I read, I believe I would have died..."

If You Meet the Buddha on the Road, Kill Him!
Dr. Sheldon B. Kopp